A Trying week

Well, I don't know where to start. It has been a busy, hectic and rough week. I am having a big Fibro flare which just makes everything hard. I apologized to Lillian today and tried to explain that my whole body hurts and I can't sleep well and it makes me cranky.

She is processing a lot right now and is a bit cranky herself. In the past week, she has prompted in-depth conversations about mortality and how life began----not her life, but life in general. At bedtime in Saturday, she asked me if Paco and I would die and whether she would die. I told her the truth and she cried and asked lots of questions. We talked about bodies and souls and reincarnation and burial. She has been very clingy, acting out, and terrified to sleep in her own room since this conversation. Paco and I told her that we understand that these are hard things to think about and may feel scary and if she has any questions, she should just ask us. We also told her she can sleep downstairs for awhile until she is not so scared. That helped a lot.

Tonight at dinner she asked me "if nobody was here, who grew us?" After a few clarifying questions, I determined she was asking how people came into being. Wooooo...first death and a few days later she slaps me with THE BIG QUESTION. I explained the concept of God as simply as I could and told her that whatever began the first life--even if that was just a little fish or a plant, it was something amazing and mysterious. She seemed satisfied for the time being and we did not go into evolution. The poor child has just discovered she and her family will die, I don't think I can hit her with her primate past right now.

Of course, Paco is still working doubles so I am dealing with all this, the pain, the farm, and bushels of produce alone and sometimes I just want to get in the car and drive away.----to a place with plush robes, a masseuse, and sparkling water.

A little comic relief---Lillian accosted Paco getting out of the shower (something he hates because she points and says --I see your winky!) and says to him "just so you know, you need to be more careful about not taking all the blankets at night. You try to wrap yourself like an enchilada and we get cold. Please try to stop this. Thanks.

Dog Days of Summer

Pictures are of Lillian dressed up "fancy" like Fancy Nancy, Lillian holding a handful of Mexican Sour Gherkins (ie Mouse Melons) from the garden, and Lillian after she has smeared avocado all over her face.

These are the dog days of summer. WE have been 90+ all week. The upside is the pool is 86-90 degrees all the time. We have spent our days playing and working. Lillian and I are still enjoying playgroups, yoga, and library programs. I try to get something fro the garden preserved in some fashion every day. Today my goal is eggplant. I think my attempt will be to dry the big ones and roast the pintung for dinner. I have 100's of tomatoes out there, but so far have had only 2 ripe ones. The cold spring has those heat lovers pushed back. Lillian and I picked a quarter bushel of tomatillos that I canned into salsa yesterday. There are 4 times that more coming. Salsa verde and chili verde is something that we can almost not have enough of.

My health is good--much better. Lillian and Paco have colds right now and I don't----completely MIRACULOUS!!! I am still not sleeping great and am having some digestive upset, but have some a long, long way. I did return to Zyrtec, due to headaches, but am not taking singulair or anything else for allergies/asthma. I am having a good summer and dread that it is flying past so fast.

Construction in front of La Scala is the blight on our summer. It is AWFUL and we are in dire financial starights. We will persevere, I know but it is really awful. Paco is working every night but Thursday, which makes extra long days for me too. I am so looking forward to Purdue being back in session and the sidewalk being done.

Beware what you plant, it may grow

The family reunion is over now and was a great success. It was hard to say goodbye to my family. I desperately want my parents to move here, but I don't think it is in the cards--at least not anytime soon.

Now that family has come and gone, I am dealing day and night with the fruits of my labor--I should say--meat, veggies, and milk of my labors. Honestly, I am afraid of my garden. Everything is growing like crazy. The squash vines will soon be coming in my bedroom window at night to strangle me. Cucumbers have gone insane. I have already made more pickles than we will ever eat and I have another planting coming on. Zucchini are pouring in and I have already harvested zuchinno ramipicante---the horn shaped Italian heirloom. I harvested the first tomatoes today--green sausage. I am not too impressed with them. I am battling potato beetles, but insect pressure has been low otherwise. Garlic is all curing. I am harvesting carrots as we can use them and a few onions too. The weeds are out of control in the raspberries. Eggplants are forming fruits like crazy and I have harvested a few. I have a large amount of poblanos already and some bell peppers. My beets are huge. I am trying some in the dehydrator. I also dried some of the squash and am pleased with the results--good for soups and casseroles. Frozen squash is abysmal. ooh, I almost forgot the mouse melons--Mexican Sour Gherkins--they are amazingly cute and delicous. Lillian eats all I can harvest. I will defintely grow them again, but in a raised bed or container, they are so tiny they get lost.

I have put up cherry, strawberry, raspberry, and currant jam--all made with agave nectar instead of sugar. I am making cheese for aging as milk accumulates. Dad helped me make Havarti last week and I made Gouda yesterday. All 14 Mr. Dinner's are in the freezer. Paco and I did one and it took an hour. A week later, Paco hired our dishwasher, Felix, to help him with the other 13 which were processed in the matter of 3 hours!! Felix grew up in the chicken business in Mexico. The first Mr. Dinner was turned into a Mexican-style Chicken soup today with our home grown carrots, squash, onions, cilantro, and garlic. How is that for local eating? Lillian just said we did a great job--"Mr. Dinner tastes just like regular chicken." If my calculations are right, we should be getting eggs from the Charlottes by the end of the month. Yippee!!

Lillian is having a great summer. She was thrilled to have a week of 24/7 playmates in her 4 cousins. her and Tory's birthday celebration was great and we took everyone to Indiana Beach on Tuesday. She was not the daredevil of last year, but did have great fun shooting water at Grampy, Sky, Tory, and Daddy and riding the Ferris wheel with Grampy and Daddy. Mom and I kept our feet firmly on the ground. Paco missed the boat, literally, while Mom, Dad, Lily, and I took a tour on Lake Shafer.

my little zookeeper

Lillian finished her 2nd bout of zoo camp today. The picture is of her holding an armadillo. She did great and has demonstarted for us her armadillo defense pose. She said it is armadillo yoga.

In other news, I cannot locate my Ipod. I think I will hyperventilate.

Also, I have woken up at 4 am for the past 2 days in a row. I miss remeron. This morning, I said forget this and went to the kitchen and took a muscle relaxer.

What herbivore do I look like?

All signs point to it being garlic harvest time. Lillian and I dug a few bulbs yesterday to make sure. Lillian was "using up all her might" clawing the sun baked earth away from one with her hands and said"what herbivore do I look like mom?"

After congratulating her on her vocab, I took a few stabs at it and she finally told me she was a squirrel---(technically an omnivore I believe.)

If that wasn't enough (and it was), we pulled a baby "cosmic purple" carrot out of the ground to check our progress and she wanted to eat it beofre I could even wash it off with the hose!

There are many times a week when I wonder what I was thinking starting a farm and then I have experiences like the ones above and I know exactly why. It makes it all worth it.

It was just about a year ago while listenin to Kingsolver's Animal, Vegetable, Miracle that I decided to take this on. Now we have 4 goats, 27 chickens, and a huge garden. It is a hellacious amount of work and I have developed muscles I haven't had for years. It's crazy, but I love it.

Lillian is now the proud owner of her own yoga mat and Yoga Pretzels card deck. We do yoga together 3-4 times a week. The card deck is awesome and I highly recommend it.

Boogie Woogie

I bought sour cherries at the Farmer's Market this morning with the idea of making a batch of jam and a pie for the freezer. I stopped at Payless for sugar-free pectin. After I spent 1 1/2 hours pitting cherries, I found out that the sure-jel sugar free brand only works with splenda or sugar. Crappo! I used sugar and made the reduced sugar version. Note to self and others interested in making jam or jelly without refined sugar---use the ball brand. They have you use apple juice and no additional sweetener or an alternative sweetener. I use agave nectar and the results have been great!!

Lizzie's feet are doing much better and the process is getting easier too. She doesn't like it, but will tolerate me holding one hoof at a time first in Epsom salts and then in antibiotic baths. She seems to know it is helping.

Lillian is going great, although she is getting dark circles under her eyes and I wonder if she is going to get sick. We had playgroup, yoga, and our weekly sushi lunch yesterday. She is a natural yogi. It is a great class. Our teacher, Suni, is from Puerto Rico and told us she organizes a Spanish speaking play group and asked us to come. She also runs a local mom's group that organizes lots of activities. Hopefully, it will not be like Mom's Club---way too blond, suburban, and pink!!! Since she teaches yoga and is from PR I hold out as lot of hope. And she has a 4 year old named Sebastian. Lily and I have one week of yoga left, but we signed up for another month session. It has been a great class.

I am still sleeping very poorly. I call the ND and the MD to get their opinions on what to do.
ND--continue the seditol plus herbal blend over the weekend and see how it goes, Monday she will prescribe an extended release melatonin.
MD--wanted me to try trazodone. After researching this I decided no way. Some studies say it is tumor causing. give me a break. get good sleep so I can die prematurely of cancer??

Needless to say, I will wait for melatonin and hope that helps.

The video is of Lillian dancing at La Scala. It was the grand opening of the bar and Lillian had an absolutely fantastic time. The musician is Joe Young.

cucumbers!!

Night before last, Lillian had the first cucumber right out of the garden. We are growing an heirloom variety called mini white and they are delicious. There was another yesterday, so mom got a taste too. We will soon have a steady little crop.

Lizzie, our milking doe has an infection on her feet. One foot is pretty bad. I had been cleaning and disinfecting daily with a little success, but things got worse quickly and Dr. Alinovi paid us a visit yesterday. Now, before milking I am soaking each hoof in epsom salts and then in an antibiotic bath. It is a big pain in the butt, but I am so glad it is helping her. By doing the topical soaks, we get to keep our milk. An antibiotic shot would have meant 28 days off milk. I hope this works.

We are gearing up for the family reunion. 17 people for 4 days and 9 for 7 days. I have a menu and have a few things in the freezer already. Lillian is very excited. She is overjoyed at 4 cousins who will want to play, jump, and swim as much as she does.

My health is better in general. I am finally being treated for hypothyroidism and it has helped a great deal. I had to give my MD and ultimatum--treat me or I am leaving. I have gone off the remeron (anti-depressant that helped with sleep also). I have also stopped taking Singulair. Life without remeron is good in that I have already lost 5 pounds in 3 weeks (it heightens appetite greatly), but my sleep is suffering a lot. I still take zanaflex that gets me to sleep, but I sleep very poorly after the first few hours. I am trying some herbal remedies with the ND, but am already feeling the effects of my sleeping disorder coming back. I am especially concerned since I have a family reunion to host.

Ahhhh...popsicle days

I am not a heat person, but since moving to the country, summer has grown on me in a big way. We spend as much time outside as we do in and I love it. Having a pool makes the heat much more tolerable.

Friday night, we were all working in the garden when we heard one of our rooster's make a first attempt at crowing. it was pretty funny. Now more of them are doing it and practice is helping.

One of my favorite things about summer is that Lily and Paco have a nightly ritual of eating Popsicles on the porch after dinner. Lily gets in Dad's lap and they giggle and chat. Mom gets a chance to clean up the kitchen and get the milking tote ready.

Garden update---harvested beets, lots of lettuce, and 2 heads of cheddar cauliflower. Amish paste tomatoes have green tomatoes on them. All the squashes have blossoms except Zuchinno Rampicante and Tatume. Mouse melons are growing well, but no blossoms yet. Mini white cukes are growing great and have plenty of blossoms. Kale needs harvested. First tomatillos are forming and one eggplant has a small fruit. I made 2 batches of sugar free strawberry jam during the storm last night. The sugar free sure-jel worked great and I used 1 cup of agave nectar per batch as sweetener. The yield is far less due to the missing sugar, but now we have a product that is healthier for all of us and mom can eat!!

Father's Day---Lillian made Paco a picture of he and I getting married---complete with veil, dress, and us holding hands. that child is a ball of love. she drew herself in the picture too. She says that she wasn't born yet, but she was there in our hearts. wahhh!

A writer is born

Lillian is actively learning to write her letters and spell. You can practically see the gears clicking in her head. SHe drew a picture last night of herself, me and paco and labeled it dad, mom, and lily. What a wonder. She made it for me to take with me to the movies so I could have it in my purse. What a kid!! I will post it here.





Lily and I are taking yoga together on Fridays. We both love it. It is something physical I can do with her. After yoga, we go to the little health food cafe around the corner. Lillian has veggie sushi. She starts her new ballet class today. It will be closer to us and her friend Julia is in the same class.

Ants in my feet

Lillian was hopping up and down yelping the other night while getting ready for bed. After my inquiry, she told me that she had ants in her feet. She said they were all tingly and hurt. I explained that there were no ants and they were just asleep. She doesn't fully grasp the concept because then she said--oh, because I am too poky getting ready for bed? My feet fell asleep before I did!

we are adjusting to summer and it's more laid back schedule, but we have more work than ever!! Actually, now that the La Scala bar project is done and the house on 10Th street has refinished floors and renters now living there, we are not PSYCHO busy anymore, but still it's a bit crazy around here.

We are hosting a family reunion for a long July 4Th weekend and have a lot of garage cleaning out to do so we can turn it into a giant dining room. Our 4 car garage is MUCH bigger than our house and we can set up a nice dining room, IF we can move out the 13 years of accumulated ephemera and restaurant junk. Mom and dad very nicely bought us an extra fridge for the garage to hold all the food. We really need an extra fridge anyway between all the milk and produce being the fruits of our farm labor.

The garden is doing well. As huge as it is --about 3200 sq/ft, I could use more space!! We are already harvesting chard, lettuce, broccoli, and beets.

More later--Lily and I have to go pick chard for dinner and then take a dip!!

Mom is going to slip out tonight to see Sex and the City. Yippee!!

Farm Days

Well, I have even considered stopping my posts because I am so behind, but here I am. Winter is done. Hurrah!! Healthwise I was OK until January and it has been pretty rough since then.

The pictures are not too recent, but one is Lily kissing a Valentine. Emma and Valentine are big girls now and almost weened. The other is of Lillian carrying the box of baby chicks back to the barn the morning they came. The chicks are 4 weeks old now and we have had only 4 casulaties out of 30 chicks. Lillian is slowly coming to terms with the fact hat some of these birds will be food and some will be for eggs. In the spirit of Animal, Vegetable, Miracle she knows that extra eggs will be hers to sell. She has already lined up a few customers. She is an absolutely outstanding farmer and I am so proud of her. She often accompanies me on chores. She has learned how to milk--especially if it meand squirting the barn walls! She helps feed and water too. Now that the goats are out on pasture, she feeds the kids dandelions while I milk. She loves her chocolate milk and Lizzie mozzarella!

Lillian was very proud to have mom and Valentine visit preschool for farm week. School is almost over now (only 2 weeks left!). She has loved it and it has been great for her. She has really blossomed in the past month or so and is now a little chatterbox at school. We want to keep the momentum going and have signed her up fro dance, soccer, and four sessions of Zoo Camp.

Our farm is really going now. The goats are doing great. We made it through deworming, birth, disbudding and milking in 4 below! The chickens are doing well and almost ready to move outside. The garden is fenced in and I have had mostly great successed with starting my own veggies from seed. Paco gave me my heart's desire for our anniversary--a small greenhouse which is packed full of wonderful things like green sausage tomato, wonderberry, mexican sour gherkins, triamble squash, and zucchino rampicante plants! When you are buying heritage seeds and not just the same old hybrids from the grenhouses, it is amazing what you can grow.

In about 3 weeks, we will be receiving fruit plants---strawberry, rhubarb, raspberry, blackberry, 3 kinds of grapes, and even a species of kiwi! I am so excited--as well as overwhelmed, tired, and sunburned!

"My Body Couldn't Stop Watching"

Lillian now uses this phrase when something is really wonderful to watch--like the parades at Disney World and the Velveteen Rabbit theatre piece we just saw. She also says things like "my body needs a carrot" and "My body wants to stay with you mom"

The picture is of Lillian making a snow angel in our latest snowfall. What a wet winter! We trekked to the back of the property to try out her new sled, but there was too much snow and we got too wet and cold getting back there to really stay long. Once inside we warmed up with some goat's milk hot chocoalte.

The other pic is of Valentine and Emma born on Sunday afternoon-Feb. 2. They had already been born when I got to the barn and I just helped clean them off and brought them in to get warm. We had already pretty much decided to bottle raise them, but when Emma tried to nurse, Lizzie clomped her in the head with a back hoof. Her maternal instinct is zero and she wants nothing to do with them. Our decision was made for us. They were inside in a dog kennel for about 4 days and now they are in the barn with the does. Paco sectioned off a corner of the stall with a heat lamp for them.

Since we got doelings, we won't have to deal with castration, but we are going to have to disbud this weekend. This entails burning off the nubs under the skin that will soon become horns. Sounds fun, huh?

Lizzie is a crappy mom but a stupendous milker! Her milk is still builiding and we are already getting 1 1/2+gallons a day. About half of that goes to Emma and Vaklentine, who are sleek and happy. I have made some feta and It is wonderful!!

Another busy Valentine's Day has come and gone. La Scala broke sales records and Paco and I marked 13 married years. He got me a small greenhouse and I got him a gold bracelet. I have all my seeds and some on order and am itching to get the greenhouse going!

Our chickens are on order. We expect 15 Araucana pullets for eggs and 15 Cronish cross for meat. I am still debating about turkeys. Turkeys and chickens are supposed to be raised separately and that just won't work very well for us.

Lillian, who named the doelings, is getting used to the goats and has been accompanying me to the barn for the evening milking. She really likes that she has milk she is not allergic too and that she can have grilled cheese sandwiches!!